The Living Nature of Values

Yesterday’s gathering with the LT Big Brother NL community was very cozy. We set out to talk about values - such a familiar word, almost overused - and yet, within minutes, it became clear how layered and alive it actually is. What seems solid at first glance begins to shift the moment we ask, “What does this mean to you?” and even more so when we ask, “In which context?”

We explored how values live on different layers of our lives. Personally, a value can feel intimate, vulnerable, tied to childhood memories or private turning points. Professionally, the same value might take on structure, boundaries, and responsibility. On a broader, collective level - especially within a diasporic community - it starts carrying cultural memory, shared narratives, sometimes even unspoken expectations. The word itself stays the same, yet its texture changes depending on where we are standing.

What moved me deeply was how language entered the conversation. When we translate a value from Lithuanian into Dutch or English, something subtle shifts. Sometimes it expands, sometimes it loses warmth, sometimes it gains sharpness. We realised that misunderstanding often doesn’t come from disagreement about the value itself, but from the invisible layers of meaning shaped by language and context. A word carries history. It carries tone. It carries culture. And if we don’t pause to unpack that, we risk thinking we are aligned when we are not - or worse, thinking we are misaligned when we actually share the same essence.

There was something beautiful about witnessing openness not just as a concept we were dissecting, but as something we were actively practicing. People were willing to sit in ambiguity. To admit uncertainty. To refine their own definitions out loud. There was space for nuance, and no rush to conclude. That, to me, felt like the real value being embodied.

Bringing in the STRIVE cards added another layer I truly cherish. I love when reflection becomes tangible - when hands touch cards, when images and prompts disrupt linear thinking and invite intuition into the room. The cards opened unexpected angles, sparked new interpretations, and created bridges between internal reflection and shared dialogue. Receiving feedback and fresh ideas about them felt generous and energising. It reminded me that tools only truly come alive in community - when they are questioned, expanded, and reshaped by many perspectives.

What stayed with me most was the collective intelligence. No one tried to own the “correct” definition of anything. Meaning was something we built together, slowly, respectfully, layer by layer. In a world that often rewards certainty and quick answers, choosing to sit in complexity feels almost radical. And yet, it is in that complexity that depth emerges.

I left feeling grounded and grateful. Grateful for the trust. Grateful for the courage people bring into these spaces. Grateful that I get to hold space for conversations that are not about performance, but about inquiry. There is something profoundly humbling about safeguarding a container where people can explore who they are across languages, across roles, across identities.

Yesterday reminded me that values are not static statements we hang on walls. They are living negotiations. They are shaped by context, translated through culture, and embodied through action. And when we take the time to explore them together, they become less about definition and more about connection. I carry that with me today.